Exclusive: Jeff Durbin Faces New Allegations of Slander, Gossip, & More
- Sarah Leann Young
- 3 days ago
- 14 min read
Warning: The following report includes descriptions of domestic violence, psychological abuse, and references to child abuse that may disturb some readers. Please read with discretion.
Shocking allegations involving a breach of pastoral confidentiality, slander, and gossip have emerged out of Apologia Church against Jeff Durbin and the other elders of the church, once again raising questions about the integrity of their leadership, and now their alleged mishandling of private marital conflicts and survivors of domestic violence.
Apologia Church is a Reformed Baptist church in Mesa, Arizona known for its street evangelism, pro-life activism, Calvinist doctrine, and media outreach through Apologia Studios, but if you’ve been following us for a while, you know about their reported history of misconduct, including allegedly recording private conversations with parishioners for retaliatory use, reviling other Christian ministry leaders, and their defense of court-ruled child abusers in their church.
Led by pastors Jeff Durbin, Luke Pierson, Zach Morgan, and James White, Apologia church has gained national attention for its abolitionist stance and activism against abortion. Since its founding in 2010, Apologia has presented itself as a beacon of biblical truth, emphasizing the local church, discipleship, and accountability in its elder-led church, but allegations of abuse and misconduct are stacking up against Apologia Church, and have been for years.
Recent allegations from a former regular attendee, Hailey Osborn-Merris, whose TikTok exposés have gone viral, suggest a cultic pattern of dishonesty, spiritual abuse, gossip, slander, breaching confidentiality, and more.
In this exclusive report, I’ll break down Hailey’s allegations of slander and breach of confidentiality against Apologia Church’s elders. I'll also talk about the red flags of deception, manipulation, and abuse in Jeff Durbin’s response to the allegations, and explain how this report is only the first of multiple allegations Hailey is making against Apologia Church.
A Marriage Needing Guidance
Hailey Osborn-Merris is a survivor of domestic violence who suffers from PTSD caused by the significant abuse she experienced in her previous marriage. Below is a redacted portion of a police report from a particularly severe incident Hailey experienced with her ex-husband. Sensitive information has been redacted for Hailey's safety and privacy.
After divorcing her ex-husband and getting remarried, Hailey and her husband Cameron began having conflict, and in an effort to find resolution and prevent their new marriage from heading down an unhealthy path, they went to the elders of Apologia Church for marriage counseling.
During their time in counseling, Hailey and Cameron shared private and sensitive details and disagreements about their conflicts through text messages, phone calls, and in-person counseling sessions with elders Jeff Durbin, Luke Pierson, and Zack Morgan. Details and disagreements they believed would be kept confidential by their pastors.
Hailey says her conflicts with her husband started as mere arguments and tension, but after beginning counseling with Apologia, they escalated, and she and her husband became divided against each other within a matter of months.
The Allegations: Breach of Confidentiality, Gossip, and Slander at Apologia Church
After a few months of marriage counseling with Apologia Church’s elders, Hailey and Cameron’s disputes started escalating to the point of getting the police involved. One of these incidents occurred on July 25th of 2024.
Cameron and Hailey each shared their accounts of this incident with Apologia’s elders in confidence and, again, with the expectation that it would remain private. Hailey wanted to discuss the incident in person or over the phone due to its sensitive nature, but the elders insisted Hailey give her account via text or audio recording.
According to the screenshot evidence Hailey has provided, private details of this incident (both accurate and allegedly slanderous) were spread to other members of Apologia Church, including Jeff Durbin’s daughter, Saylor (Durbin) Perez.
The same day Cameron shared his account of their domestic dispute with Apologia Church’s elders, but before Hailey had shared her account with anyone at Apologia Church, Ms. Perez can be seen in text screenshots talking about the incident with other members of the church, and according to Hailey's testimony of the incident, slandering her as well.
Because of Apologia Church’s alleged slander, gossip, and confidentiality breach, Hailey is publishing a portion of the police report for this incident to set the record straight and defend her reputation.
According to the police report, Hailey's testimony to the police, and her testimony to Apologia's elders, Saylor Perez (Durbin) gave a different story for how Hailey’s dispute with her husband unfolded. It's possible Ms. Perez and Apologia's elders were taking Cameron's privately shared version of the incident as gospel truth without hearing Hailey's account or reading the police report, but to then share an unverified version of a private marital dispute with others without permission is the definition of gossip.
Ms. Perez's statements in the screenshots of her group chat also blatanly contradict the police report in a few important places.
The police didn't take Hailey's gun according to their report, and according to both Cameron and Hailey's testimony to the police, Hailey didn't point her gun at anyone.
Excommunication and Threats of Humiliation
Before Hailey learned of Apologia Church’s alleged gossip and slander, however, she and Cameron were essentially excommunicated after the July 25th 2024 incident because of their marital conflicts and Jeff Durbin's claims about Hailey's character. Claims that paint Hailey as a "violent abuser", which Hailey vehemently denies.
Despite not being official members, which Hailey is now thankful for, after they confided in the elders about the domestic dispute involving the police, the elders accused Hailey of being unstable, unrepentant, violent, and ultimately banned both her and her husband from Apologia Church.
Besides kicking them out of the church, however, Apologia’s elders also threatened Hailey and Cameron with “...bringing this matter before the church...” if they chose to “...respond sinfully...” by speaking to “...parties who have no business being in the interior of your marriage crisis...”
Hailey was confused and taken aback by this message and responded to their unofficial excommunication with several documented examples of her repentance, willingness to be corrected, and receive counsel from the church. She shared screenshots as evidence for her contrition and remorse over the turmoil in her marriage, and her role in it, although she denies being a “violent abuser,” as she has been accused.
Heartbroken by their suggestion that she would slander them, Hailey reiterated her love and respect for Apologia’s elders, calling Jeff Durbin her “hero of the faith.”
Apologia Church's Excommunication of Hailey & Cameron
Hailey's First Attempt to Reconcile With Apologia Church's Elders
Despite Hailey’s efforts to stay connected with Apologia Church and show her commitment to receiving counsel and correction, the elders appeared to dismiss and ignore her attempt to reconcile and reason together. Two months later when she reached out to ask for prayer following a separation with her husband, Hailey says they ignored her again.
Apologia's Response: Red Flags of Deception & Doubling Down
Several months after being kicked out of Apologia Church and ghosted by its elders, in March 2025, Hailey was just a few weeks postpartum when she discovered Jeff Durbin’s alleged gossip, breach of confidentiality, and slander via a group chat with Saylor Perez. Ironically, she was also alerted to allegations of slander, gossip, and “faction building” against her following her departure from the church.
Hailey initially published a TikTok video with her allegations against Apologia after confronting Jeff Durbin with her allegations the first time. After all, they’d ignored her previous attempts to reconcile and kicked her and her husband out of the church. Despite this, Hailey decided to take the video down and confront the elders of Apologia directly before continuing with a public confrontation.
Hailey Confronts Jeff Durbin for Alleged Breach in Confidentiality, Gossip, & Slander
Jeff Durbin Responds to Hailey's Allegations
In Jeff's response to Hailey, he appears to deflect and ignore her allegations, instead focusing on her "improper" TikTok confrontation against Apologia and hinting at legal action against her. After this first confrontation by Hailey and the response by Durbin, Hailey and Cameron then engaged in several back and forth messages via text with Apologia's elders.
Hailey & Cameron's Repeated Attempts to Confront & Reconcile with Apologia Church's Elders
In Apologia's responses to Hailey, Jeff Durbin denies a breach in confidentiality, but then justifies one with the fact that Hailey and Cameron’s conflict was technically “public record” through the police report. This excuse is lacking and irrelevant for several reasons.
When Hailey and Cameron confidentially shared their domestic dispute with their pastors, despite their differing opinions on what happened, they expected privacy, a basic standard in pastoral counseling, but Durbin’s claim that the dispute was “public record” due to police involvement fails to justify a breach of confidentiality. Neither Cameron nor Hailey consented to Apologia's elders sharing these private details and disagreements, which divulged far more than what was reported by the police, including allegations against Hailey that have never been investigated or verified.
Simply labeling privately shared information “public” doesn’t absolve a pastor of their ethical duty to maintain discretion and respect the privacy of their parishioners, especially when they don't know both sides of the story. This flies directly in the face of everything Durbin has been teaching about gossip for years.
Besides this alleged violation of Hailey and Cameron’s privacy, Durbin also seemed to suggest he was in possession of the police report for this incident, and that Saylor might have been too, to justify her knowledge of it. Even if this were true, it doesn't account for her false portrayal of what happened according to Hailey's testimony.
It also doesn't account for what the police office clerk told Hailey when she obtained the report on 8/18/25. She recorded her conversation with the clerk to document what they told her: that no one else had asked for these reports before Hailey did, on August 18th, 2025.
So it appears that Jeff Durbin not only breached his pastoral obligation to confidentiality and potentially misrepresented Hailey in doing so, but he may have also been lying by suggesting he had a copy of the police report as “evidence” against Hailey.
Strangely, Durbin also contradicts his excuse for the alleged breach by claiming Saylor “...doesn’t remember...” where she heard about it. To make matters worse, he's also threatened legal retaliation if Hailey continues her public confrontation against Durbin and Apologia Church.
When I emailed Apologia Church for comment, correction, or clarification, I shared Hailey’s allegations with them. I asked Jeff Durbin multiple times to clarify which allegations of Hailey’s were false according to him, but he refused to engage with me, answer my questions, or provide any information substantiating his claims.
He also threatened to use information he thinks I don't have, which almost exclusively consists of private information and disputes shared with him by Hailey and Cameron about their marriage, to "embarrass" me in court.
My repeated attempts to hear Durbin's perspective ultimately resulted in accusations of harassment against me and more legal threats. My full email correspondence with Apologia's elders and Jeff Durbin can be seen below.
My Email Correspondence with Apologia Church & Jeff Durbin
Something else worth mentioning is Durbin's reference to "video" evidence against Hailey and his threats to use it against her. As Hailey has publicly noted on her TikTok page, this particular "evidence" can only be a video of Hailey and Cameron’s children. To share a video that includes Hailey and Cameron's children, which was shared privately with the elders of Apologia Church in a marriage counseling context, would be an invasion of their minor children's privacy and a breach of confidentiality.
In his response to Hailey's confrontation, Durbin also claimed that Hailey shared the incident involving the police with James White’s daughter, Summer Jaeger, to justify a breach of confidentiality, and that she will "testify" against Hailey. Text screenshots show, however, that Hailey didn’t tell Summer about the incident until several days after Saylor Perez was talking about it with other Apologians in the group chat.
By claiming Summer Jaegar stands ready as a "witness" against Hailey, Durbin may have actually exposed Summer for gossip, since according to Hailey, her disclosures to Summer were given in confidence as well.
Another Apologia member, David Martinez, who claims to be the person Hailey references in this video, has publicly maligned her on X, claiming she "...obviously suffers from a mental health issue..." He also accuses me of false reporting, but doesn't substantiate either of these claims.
Ultimately, in response to Hailey's allegations, it appears Jeff Durbin and Apologia Church's other elders are doubling down and doing the very things they're being accused of: gossiping, slandering, and breaching confidentiality against Hailey and Cameron.
Hailey Summarizes Her Evidence Against Apologia Church
As Hailey fights to heal her marriage and find peace after her time in Apologia Church, she has published several videos on TikTok breaking down her evidence, experiences, and allegations against them. The following is a statement she’s written for this report:
“I have compiled ten pieces of evidence (one of which includes three testimonies grouped together) that establish a clear chain showing that my private marital struggles were disclosed by church leadership, weaponized, and spread through gossip in a group chat:
Group chat screenshot where my private marital struggles were discussed.
Texts from Pastor Zach Morgan (July 30th and 31st 2024) asking Cameron and me about our marriage. We both gave testimony on separate occasions (Cameron on July 30th, myself on August 2nd).
Saylor Perez (Durbin) gossiped on July 30th, 2024. This overlap confirms that the information could have only come from church leadership.
My written testimony to leadership.
Texts to Summer Jaeger where I shared (in confidence) a screen recording of my text exchanges with them including my testimony from August 2nd, 2024.
Slander testimony from Luke, who admitted in a meeting with other members that “she heard it from other women in the church."
Text from Jeff Durbin stating “Saylor doesn’t remember where she heard.”
Text from Jeff Durbin stating “Summer stands ready to testify.”
Text from another member of the church after a meeting was held with all three elders claiming “your situation was public record.”
Testimony from the PD clerk, confirming that no one but me had obtained police reports to date. The reports themselves include time-stamped print logs.
The leadership did not have the police reports according to the PD clerk. The PD clerk’s testimony and timestamped print logs prove that.
The story changed when leadership was questioned. Jeff Durbin deflected when asked directly about the police report.
The information could only have come from Jeff or another elder. Zoe Morgan clearly didn’t know about the incident until Saylor Perez (Durbin) mentioned my marital struggles in the context of sharing “tea.”
Elders first reached out to Cameron, who confided in them for counseling and help, not punishment. They reached out to me the next day, July 31st, 2024. I told them the police were already involved and that I preferred an in-person meeting. Instead, they pushed me to share testimony over text or voice recording.
I withheld evidence over text because I was uncomfortable and had a strong sense it wouldn’t be safe to share it that way. That’s why it took me nearly three days to provide my testimony.
Now, my private confessions and testimony are being weaponized. This occurred not only during but even before the formal process of church discipline.
This evidence demonstrates:
A breach in confidentiality by elders.
Gossip and slander spreading through the church, including from leadership families.
A manipulation of testimony intended for counseling and accountability, now weaponized against me.
Clear dishonesty from Jeff Durbin and leadership when asked about the origin of these disclosures.”
After Hailey started publicly accusing Apologia Church of gossip and slander, Jeff Durbin contacted her husband Cameron with threats of legal action and hints of "exposing" her while being sympathetic toward Cameron. As I said at the beginning of this report, Hailey feels that after her marriage counseling with Apologia's elders, she and her husband became divided.
After seeing this text from Durbin to Cameron, Hailey adds, "That's why I think Jeff thinks it's okay to text my husband like this. Because we became divided after our counseling with Apologia Church."
Cameron has given me permission to publish the texts for this report.
When I asked him for a statement on Apologia Church, I asked him if he felt that they’d misrepresented them and if he supports Hailey's public allegations against them. Cameron gave the following statement:
Opinion #1: Apologia Church Exhibits Cultic Spying, Gossip, & Blackmail
In abusive, high-control cults, victims aren't allowed to defend themselves, confront abuse and corruption, or hold leaders accountable. If they try, they're often met with gaslighting, deception, deflection, and DARVO (i.e., Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim & Offender).
When it comes to Apologia Church, there appears to be a pattern of blackmailing members with their private confessions and "sins" to keep them silent. Based on the public allegations against Apologia Church by other former members, Hailey's allegations further expose this pattern. The testimonies of multiple former members of Apologia Church, including Hailey's, indicate an abusive and cultic culture of gossip, spying, and blackmailing.
In a culture like this, leaders will gain the confidence and trust of members through counseling and an appearance of compassionate care for church members. Through this early love-bombing phase, leaders are able to gather private and sensitive information about members, which can later be used against them if confronted with allegations of abuse, corruption, or other misconduct.
By publicly speaking about her allegations against Apologia Church, Hailey is sacrificing some of her own privacy to uncover the truth about what appears to be abusive and cultic church leadership. This is a daunting choice for any survivor of a high-control church or cult, and understandably so.
Since posting her allegations against Apologia Church's elders on TikTok, Hailey is already allegedly being further slandered and gossiped about by them, being labeled mentally ill by member David Martinez (above), and facing threats of her private marital struggles being shared further without her consent.
Despite Apologia Church's threats and backlash from members like David Martinez, Hailey says she isn't backing down. She has continued posting on TikTok to bring accountability in any way that she can and has been encouraged by the support of many former and current Apologia Church members.
Opinion #2: It’s Time for Accountability
As I noted earlier, Hailey’s allegations are eerily similar to allegations that have been made against Apologia’s elders before. This isn’t the first time former members, and even non-members of Apologia Church, have claimed to be victims of slander, gossip, abuse, and negligence by its leaders. Hailey’s story further corroborates alleged abuses within Apologia Church that people have been publicly decrying for years.
These cries seem to have fallen on deaf ears within Apologia Church’s leadership, but the God who shepherds His sheep directly and delivers them from the abusive shepherds of this age hears those cries. As abuse, corruption, and scandals of all kinds continue to rise in the institution of the Christian Church, it’s clear from every case that hits the headlines that accountability is coming, but it isn’t coming from our so-called "leaders".
It’s time for accountability, and God is bringing it.
Cindy Clemishire isn’t a pastor. Neither is Eileen Gray, Chelsey Hendrickson, Hailey Osborn-Merris, or the countless others who have come forward with allegations of abuse against leaders in the Christian Church. Despite what authoritarian church leaders like Jeff Durbin may claim, the “proper order” for holding abusive church leaders accountable isn’t exclusive to “pastors” and “elders”. The idea that only pastors can mediate accusations or confrontation against other pastors isn't supported by the Bible.
All members of the Body of Christ have the authority and responsibility to confront, accuse, and hold their leaders accountable, whether they claim a title or not. And as we can see, they are.
I believe the elitist and authoritarian ideologies of church leaders like Durbin are what keep abusive and corrupt leaders protected from accountability, but it's clear from Hailey's fearless public confrontation of Apologia Church, that the silence that has long plagued its many former members is officially over.
In what many believers are beginning to recognize as a broken and corrupt system that’s designed to insulate its leaders from accountability, protect abusers, and enable corruption, opposition from those outside its offices becomes necessary. The injured sheep are standing up and doing the job their leaders should be doing, but haven’t been for a very long time.
According to Apologia Church’s own standards, it looks to me like they’ve disqualified themselves time and time again. The culture of gossip, slander, and untrustworthiness their former members are reporting is abusive and unsafe, but despite numerous calls for accountability, its elders seem to play the victim and carry on shamelessly.
The Whole Story: It Doesn’t End Here
Unfortunately, there’s even more to Hailey and Cameron’s story than allegations of a breach in confidentiality, slander, and gossip. In Jeff Durbin’s response to my emails, he claims I don’t know the whole story. That I’m missing important information about Hailey, citing and threatening her private confessions against me (and Hailey) in retaliation to this report, while refusing to share them with me to verify his claims.
Durbin is right about one thing: This isn’t the whole story.
As bad as these allegations and Durbin's behavior in response to them are, this report is only the first of Hailey's grievances with Apologia Church's leaders. There is even more to her story which further corroborates her perspective.
What’s the rest of the story? That will have to wait until our next report on Apologia Church in the coming weeks, but in the meantime, use discernment, examine everything, protect the sheep, and as always, please do not feed the wolves.
Educate yourself on the red flags of church corruption and abuse by reading our free reports: